Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

From time to time a patient will ask me, “Why doesn’t God answer my prayers?”

The Destructive Force of Misinterpretation

This question reminds me of Joe and Cindy. Joe, a respected bank president, and Cindy, a tireless realtor, joined a prominent Charismatic megachurch where they developed a deep, abiding love for Jesus Christ. As their commitment grew their diligent and dedicated service in the name of Christ earned them veneration throughout the congregation.  

Unexpectedly, a black mole on Joe’s forearm emerged as a rapidly growing malignant melanoma. The pastor and elders prayed fervently over him. They anointed his head with oil. The congregation held vigils.

Unrestrained, the cancer continued to grow. The elders told Joe and Cindy if they would pray with faith his cancer would remit. Metastases spread without ceasing. The elders rebuked Joe and Cindy, telling them that the cancer continued to fulminate because they had no faith in the power of Jesus to heal. Joe and Cindy prayed harder. The elders continued to admonish them.

Quite suddenly, Joe died believing his lack of faith killed him. His death crushed Cindy’s belief and shattered the pastor, the elders and the congregation. Soon most of the church members went their separate ways. As a result less than one hundred members occupied the massive cathedral at Sunday services.

Faith and Persistent Prayer

Genuine Biblical faith comes when we trust in and depend on God. Prayer in humble dependence strengthens our faith and personalizes a relationship with God. Certainly faith spurs prayer. Jesus says, “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be yours” (Mark 11:24).

But sometimes those things prayed for seem to fade unfulfilled.

Surely persistence augments prayer. Jesus says, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (Luke 11:9-10).

Jesus makes clear the connection between persistently requesting things and receiving them. But sometimes unrelenting pounding fails to open the door.

Who Can Know the Mind of God?

Jesus promised to fulfill our prayers. The Bible confirms the power of prayer. Why doesn’t God answer our prayers? Or does he?

I don’t know. Where was I when God created the heavens and the earth? Can I bring forth the constellations in their seasons? Or send the lightning bolts on their way? Will I contend with the Almighty to correct him? Who am I to question what God only knows?

Nevertheless God granted to all of us the power to think and to contemplate his wondrous ways. So, begging his forgiveness, here follows my infinitesimal pondering.

God’s Protection Answers Prayers

First of all, we don’t always get what we want. When I ask Vicki to bring me a glass of water she may remind me in language unrestrained by decorum that I have two good legs.  Similarly God can appropriately refuse our selfish requests.

Certainly, our human finitude limits our knowledge, wisdom and understanding. God may protect us from ourselves by declining our request. When a teenager asks for the car keys his father may refuse because the youngster lacks the skill to safely drive alone. Likewise, God protects us from our immature desires.

Similarly, if all of our prayers were granted all of the time we would have quite a mess. Chaos would reign supreme. Because prayer that works brings miracles unrestrained by time and space, God maintains order by granting or refusing our requests.

Suffering Answers Prayers

Moreover, God may allow us to suffer so we can become the person he wants us to be. Perhaps human suffering is similar to the molding of reinforcement bar. After an extreme amount of heat melts steel, the liquid is pulled through a round opening to give the rebar its shape. Installing these steel rods into concrete ensures a durable structure that will be reliable for years. Those who, with God’s help, have endured terrible suffering can strengthen and support others in distress. Pain generates empathy. Empathy, in turn, helps comfort those that suffer.   

When the airplane is crashing, a parachute is all we want. When we are suffering, God is all we need. When all we have is dead and gone, God alone is enough. Suffering allows us to love and trust God for who he is, not for what he does.

God’s Timing Answers Prayers

When unanswered prayer confronts us, we share the experience of Jesus who prayed, “Father if you are willing, remove this cup from me; nevertheless not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:24). Paul asked the Lord three times to remove the thorn from his side, but the Lord told him, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:8-9). Because Jesus suffered we have eternal life. Paul’s thorn encourages us to live by faith.

Sometimes long awaited prayers will be answered. For some of us our prayers will remain unanswered until we rest in the arms of Jesus. God’s timing is not our own, but his love is eternal.

Those puzzled by unanswered prayers may be comforted by this: “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any power, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39).

Thoughts on Prayer

Praying with Faith

The Difference Prayer Makes

Universal Desires

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