My good friend, William T. Hendricks, Jr., MD, says he helps perfectionists give up their punishing pursuits by telling them:
You have to learn to perfect your tolerance for imperfection.
In other words, “Learn to put up with your imperfections in such a way that you become perfect at accepting your mistakes and flaws.”
There are several ways perfectionists can tolerate their mistakes.
Make a statement that demands that you be perfect. Ask yourself these questions about that statement:
- Who specifically told you that?
- What makes you think that?
- Where did you learn that?
- When did you learn that?
- How do you know?
- Are your feelings based on facts?
- Will your thinking help protect your life and health?
- Will your thoughts help you avoid conflicts with others?
- Will your thinking help you feel the emotions you want to feel?