Humor has three levels: sarcasm, belly-laugh humor and cosmic humor.
Sarcasm, a passive-aggressive, hostile and destructive humor, disparages relationships and should be avoided at all times.
I see men using this with their wives all the time. They are attempting to show affection, but sarcasm has the opposite effect.
Because sarcastic remarks penetrate the unconscious as hostile, they diminish self-esteem and interfere with a loving relationship.
Statements like “I’d rather bring my wife to the convention than kiss her good-bye” or “I’ve had 12 happy years of married life that is not bad for 28 years of marriage” might be funny to some but they are terribly damaging to relationships.
Claiming that your son, “… would get into a fight in an empty room,” establishes negative expectations.
Only people with a high self esteem and utmost confidence should use self-denigrating remarks. Be careful when using statements like “Idon’t want to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members” because self-denigrating remarks can reinforces a negative view of self.
Bottom line: Avoid sarcasm and ridicule.
I will write about laughter and cosmic humor later.